AMPLIFY VOL. 37, NO. 9
Headlines highlight how, in the pursuit of power and profit, decision makers continue to put our planet in peril. Surveys show that most people no longer trust decision makers to tell the truth or privilege anyone but themselves or their organizations.1 Research shows that people feel increasingly alienated and disengaged, partly due to the unyielding focus on individual economic success and excessive work hours. Those examining the role of consumerism in shaping identity and well-being are talking about a “purpose void,” as individuals seek fulfillment through the acquisition of material possessions and experience a growing sense of isolation and diminished hope for a sense of community and shared purpose.2
Within this context, revelations of how companies are usurping our human need to be purposeful for economic gain (“purpose-washing”) represent another challenge and risk to our collective ability to change the current downward trajectory.3 Understood as “the practice of companies or organizations using the language of social or environmental responsibility to mask their true intentions and actions,” purpose washing involves the deceitful use of communication and marketing techniques “to [promote] a positive image rather than actually making meaningful change.”4
A Crisis of Purpose
Amid our profit-driven culture, it is perhaps not surprising (although concerning) that connecting purpose to profit has become big business. Some scholars discuss the possibility of shifting from a goal-based purpose (profit, productivity, etc.) to one grounded in a sense of duty toward a higher purpose and broader societal values and expectations. However, in practice, the lure of exploiting the purpose-profit link is proving too much for some to ignore.5
Beginning around 2017, a number of articles, blogs, and books began to emerge raising concerns about the crisis of purpose and meaninglessness facing employees in organizations and humanity in general. Soon after, the Big Four consulting firms weighed in on how to lead with purpose.6-8 “Cheat sheets” emerged for leading with purpose, and some experts noted that purpose-driven companies witnessed higher market share gains and growth.
A few years later, Forbes published “The Power of Purpose: The Business Case for Purpose,” quoting the Kantar “Purpose 2020” study. The study highlighted how, over a 12-year period, brands with high perceived positive societal impact experienced brand value growth of 175% versus 86% for those seen to have medium positive social impact and 70% for low positive impact.9,10 According to these sources, connecting purpose to brand reputation can lead to success.
Research indicates that some stakeholders (customers, employees, governments, etc.) believe that by investing in or buying from “purpose-driven” companies, they are doing their part to solve a problem or support a need far greater than themselves. Others feel they are being manipulated into being a cog in an economic wheel that keeps turning at any expense, purpose included.
There are dark sides to hijacking purpose as an economic instrument: when stakeholders feel betrayed, purpose-washing can have negative reputational and financial consequences. Being purpose-washed as a client, customer, employee, investor, supplier, supporter, or volunteer can result in individuals feeling cynical, disillusioned, and disconnected.11 When a stakeholder gets repeatedly purpose-washed, they may end up feeling even more purposeless.12
How can we reclaim purpose? Let’s begin with an understanding that living life with a sense of belonging and meaning is not something that’s bestowed on us. Rather, it develops over time and is influenced by factors such as individual experiences, values, and beliefs. For humans, purpose provides a sense of direction, motivation, and satisfaction in life. It is linked to improved mental and physical health as well as resilience in the face of challenges and setbacks.13
Taking the time to think critically and focus attention on the questions we ask (of ourselves and others) opens the door to curating a purposive life. And reclaiming our individual sense of purpose lets us reengage collectively, work collaboratively, and turn toward a better future together.
Good Questions
For decades, we have instructed children to not judge a book by its cover. We ask students to dig deeper and not be satisfied by what they see. As business professionals, we have learned to scrutinize our leaders — their actions, behaviors, choices, and decisions. Why? The power of critical thinking is central to our ability to navigate life’s complexities.14 At its essence, critical thinking is about thinking deeply and independently. It involves considering different perspectives, exploring assumptions, evaluating evidence, and coming to logical conclusions through reasoned judgment. The engine that fuels critical thinking is knowledge collected by asking good questions.
As children, we were obsessed with questions because we were hungry to learn. Unfortunately, many of us lost that zeal in grade school, as expectations to memorize information, regurgitate facts, and behave politely became the priority.15 As adults, many of us shy away from asking “good” questions. There are multiple reasons for this, including not having the time, wanting to keep discussions at a “high” level, not really wanting to know the answer, being afraid of the possible answer, not wanting others to think we don’t know the answer, and not wanting to trigger emotions by asking.
The truth is, many of us have forgotten how to ask good questions. As with most human activities, asking good questions is both an art and a science. But asking good questions, processing answers, and acting on the meaning we make is foundational to human growth and development.
Asking Questions
The best communicators and leaders combine the art and science of asking good questions of others and themselves. Whether to build better relationships, create an open and safe team culture, innovate, or get to the root cause of an issue, it takes courage and humility to ask pertinent, insightful, challenging questions. Doing so is also key to inspiring trust and getting others to engage and share their ideas.16 At the individual level, these communicators and leaders become life-long learners, willing to ask questions like “How can I do better?”; “What am I not seeing or considering?”; and “Who can I reach out to for support or insights?”
The Science
Good questions share some key dimensions: they are clear, concise, and relevant. Each question addresses a specific purpose, whether to challenge assumptions, gather information, provoke curiosity, or stimulate new pathways for thinking. Posing questions is a strategic endeavor: what you ask, the order in which you ask, and when you ask matter. The time of day and other contextual realities can have a tremendous impact on the answers you receive, as well as the answers you produce yourself. Anyone with a teenager in the house or in the classroom knows not to ask anything, let alone anything serious, early in the day! At work, brainstorming sessions are best held mid-morning, while questions to which you want quick answers with little to no input are great to hold until near the end of the day when most people are focused on wrapping up.
Asking why, what, when, where, and how is the first step, and learning to elevate those questions is the next. For example, “Why not?”; “What if?”; “Where else?”; and “How other?” are simple examples of how to shift perspectives, deepen conversations, and unearth innovative ideas and possibilities. A well-constructed question is open-ended, allowing for various responses and perspectives that encourage further inquiry and discussion. Well-considered questions direct attention to specific aspects of a problem or issue and help reveal assumptions and biases.
Taking the time to focus on the quality of questions asked (i.e., making them thought-provoking) can also have a strong impact. Consider how at the end of an interview, the interviewer often asks, “Do you have any questions for us?” A response such as, “When will you be making your decision?” is universally seen as a weak response. An interviewee who wants to demonstrate their knowledge through a question might ask, “In reviewing recent posts from activists, I have read about increasing demands for transparency related to your ESG metrics. How are you addressing those concerns?”
The Art
The art of asking good questions involves many dimensions. It starts with an ability and willingness to engage with vulnerability and empathy. Connecting with others means acknowledging that there may be concerns, fears, and triggers associated with the inquiry. Showing patience, learning to “nudge” the discussion forward slowly and with care, and reading the room comes with time and experience.
Vulnerability and empathy are key to building one’s emotional intelligence. Recently, a Harvard-based researcher shared how emotionally intelligent people consistently ask meaningful questions that elicit deep feelings.17 For example, you might ask: “How did you get into…?”; “What are your thoughts on…?”; or “How do you feel about…?” People who develop this capacity are known for leaving people feeling seen, heard, and valued. Other researchers have highlighted how emotionally intelligent people develop resilience by drawing on their self-exploration to share their personal mistakes and failures. Emotionally intelligent people also practice developing gratitude by asking themselves questions like “How can I learn to be grateful for this experience?”18
The artistic component of asking good questions involves one’s interpersonal skills: the “how” of asking. Recognize that the words you speak are just the starting point, followed by focusing on one’s presence — tone of voice, posture, energy level, gestures, and eye contact, to name a few. Most people do not remember exactly what was said during an interaction, but they remember how they felt.
The use of nonverbals is crucial in creating an environment where others are comfortable opening up.19 For example, using a booming voice to ask personal questions will immediately shut down the conversation. Using a dismissive tone will not compel someone to share their heartfelt issues with you. How you speak to yourself is equally important. Instead of “You dummy, why did you do that again?” try “What can I do differently next time?”
Artistic elements include active listening and the ability to respond or adapt to your audience’s verbal and nonverbal cues. Recognizing that what is said is often different than what is meant, one must be observant and develop the ability to read cues such as awkward pauses, refusal to make eye contact, and the emergence of micro-tells like a twitch (or behavior like hand-wringing and ring-twisting).
Being able to combine the art and science of asking questions leads to the most valuable answers from your audience. Equally important are the questions you ask yourself. Understanding the art and science of asking questions and building one’s skillset evolves over time and requires practice. Journalists, members of the medical community, researchers, and marketing and sales professionals are among those who are trained in the art and science of asking questions, but asking good questions is a skill that can be learned.
Reclaiming Purpose
Asking good questions helps us better understand our aspirations, goals, and values. Having worked with leaders of all ages and career stages, I can attest to the fact that discussion about their struggles to define their own sense of purpose (sometimes they talk about finding a “North Star”) emerges as a common topic for exploration. Beyond pursuing the next promotion or bonus, students, professionals, leaders, and executives are searching for deeper meaning in their work and their lives.
The path to reclaim a purposive life is a challenging one that begins with the self-awareness to “recognize” a void exists and a willingness to unpack the reasons. The next step is developing the skills and competencies to “resist” the purpose-washing that is so ubiquitous now. Finally, we need the courage and commitment to “reorient” while remaining vigilant to factors that may negatively impact us along the journey.
Recognize
It is natural to feel a bit adrift at times, but when those feelings start to run deep, it is time to engage. This process takes courage, but by engaging, you are using your agency and choosing to work toward a better future. Start by asking yourself some basic questions and do so with care and patience. Be open to authentic answers and create the time and space you will need to explore. You might ask: “Am I interested or even inspired by what I am doing?”; “Do I have a sense of direction? What am I doing and why?”; “Am I proud to share with people what I do, how I spend my time, what I am thinking about the quality of my life?”; “Do I feel a sense of belonging with the people I spend most of my time with?”; and “Who do I know that seems very focused and purposive?”
With some initial answers in hand, dig deeper: “What inspires me and makes me want to get going in the morning?”; “How can I create a sense of direction and feel proud about what I am doing and why?”; “When have I felt like I belonged with a group of people, and what impact did that have on me?”; and “If I were working toward something I would be really proud to share, what would that be?”
Meaningful inquiry can feel overwhelming, but it has the potential to create a sense of excitement for the future. The answers you offer yourself are a gift, so accept them with grace. Don’t be judgmental about your own thoughts. Through this iterative process, strive to define what a meaningful life means to you. Articulate the things you want to dedicate yourself to doing and how you want to be in service to the people or things that matter most. Come back regularly to your journal (or wherever you have expressed yourself) and check in. Your purpose will likely evolve over time.
Resist
As you begin to better understand yourself, it is important to identify factors that are unhealthy for you: those that contribute to the sense of purposelessness. These factors may stem from the norms and values of family, friends, peers, or your community. They may arise from your work culture. There are also factors that pervade society, including constant pressure to equate success with money, power with happiness, and the accumulation of material goods with a life of purpose.
Resisting starts with questions. Identify where the pressures stem from, including people, places, and things. Then ask yourself why they have such an impact on you. You must also look inward. How are you measuring living meaningfully and purposefully? Have you set reasonable or unattainable targets and expectations for yourself? Take the time to consider whether you are resisting out of anxiety, lack of time, or fear that the effort will not be worthwhile.
Finally, reflect on the importance of not going at it alone. Circles of trusted partners can help you explore and support you as you choose to do things differently. By exploring your answers, you can dig as deep as necessary and begin to articulate how to approach and address the factors that negatively influence you. Resistance can help you become less susceptible to phenomena like purpose-washing.
Reorient
Having done the difficult work of identifying what matters most to you, you will know which direction to steer. But you must invest the time, care, and attention to stay the course. You must also set some guardrails — processes and checkpoints to fend off the inevitable risks and challenges. Storms, winds, and gales will come and go; anticipate them and be prepared to navigate through or around. Keep asking questions of yourself and of your crew (after all, you shouldn’t sail the seas alone). Learn from experience, stay curious, and be open to questioning assumptions.
Don’t forget to select your crew with care, using the art and science of asking good questions. Remember that it’s not just about whether they can perform certain tasks, it’s about whether or not you’re aligned with how they choose to do them. When you find yourself wavering, embrace the discomfort, and return to the type of questions that help you return to your path: “How am I feeling?”; “Have changes in my life impacted how I feel about my purpose?”; “Are the people I am with supporting my growth and direction?”; and “Am I doing the same for them?”
How to Ask
One of my students was struggling a few years ago. They went from an energized, active, focused young professional to a shadow of themselves. After struggling through exams, they came in tears to my office and shared how pursuing a business degree was their father’s dream, not their own. The bravado they presented in the first few months of school withered under the weight of unhappiness and feeling as though they didn’t fit in with classmates who seemed to be confidently pursuing job leads in finance and consulting. They shared that their dream was to work in a specific not-for-profit in their home country but that doing so would be a disappointment for family members who had made many sacrifices to allow their only child to study abroad.
Over several conversations, the student considered questions I asked them and asked further questions of themselves. Did their family know how unhappy and unfulfilled they were? Had they considered how a business degree might help them in the not-for-profit world? How could they create a path for themselves that could include both? Through hard work and focus, they found the courage to speak with their family and discuss the path they hoped to follow. Ultimately, the student earned an undergraduate business degree and went on to complete a graduate degree in their home country. They are now helping a large, regional not-for-profit with fundraising and creating partnerships with local businesses.
I once coached a senior VP of engineering for a large multinational company that was struggling with how to spend the first year of retirement. He was offered prestigious board positions and a lucrative contract to consult at his employer. Reflecting on a series of questions, he was at once deeply worried about his answers and at the same time invigorated. Asked what he imagined himself doing after retiring, he shared how he wanted to take his grandchildren to school and be an active part of their daily lives. He said he felt some regret about not being present during his own children’s younger years. He did a lot of self-exploration and procrastinated for almost a month, worried about what others would say if he said no to the offers. Finally, he spoke with his wife and close friends. They encouraged him to do what gave him the greatest sense of purpose, and he found the courage to create a new chapter for himself. Some didn’t understand his choices and even teased him about his decision, but over time, he refocused on deepening his connection to his family.
Clearly, by skillfully practicing the science and the art of asking good questions, we can recognize purpose voids, resist purpose-washing, and redirect ourselves toward purpose.
References
1 “2024 Edelman Trust Barometer.” Edelman, accessed September 2024.
2 George, Gerard, et al. “Purpose in the For-Profit Firm: A Review and Framework for Management Research.” Journal of Management, Vol. 49, No. 6, April 2021.
3 Bonior, Andrea. “4 Immediate Steps to Combat a Sense of Helplessness.” Psychology Today, 30 June 2022.
4 “Definition: Purpose Washing.” Dictionary Marketing, accessed September 2024.
5 George et al. (see 2).
6 Genaus, Giorgio. “Finding a Sense of Purpose Work Amid Crisis.” Forbes, 18 April 2023.
7 Johnston, Charles. “Humanity’s Crisis of Purpose.” Psychology Today, 13 June 2019.
8 Steger, Michael F. “Creating Meaning and Purpose at Work.” In The Wiley Blackwell Handbook of the Psychology of Positivity and Strengths-Based Approaches at Work, edited by Lindsay G. Oades et al. Wiley-Blackwell, 2017.
9 “Purpose 2020.” Kantar, 18 May 2018.
10 Aziz, Afdhel. “The Power of Purpose: The Business Case for Purpose (All the Data You Were Looking for Pt 1).” Forbes, 7 March 2020.
11 Brooks, David. “How America Got Mean.” The Atlantic, 14 August 2023.
12 George et al. (see 2).
13 Warren, Rick. The Purpose Driven Life: What on Earth Am I Here for? Zondervan, 2012.
14 Kahneman, Daniel. Thinking, Fast and Slow. Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2011.
15 Berger, Warren. The Book of Beautiful Questions. Bloomsbury Publishing, 2018.
16 Maxwell, John C. Good Leaders Ask Great Questions: Your Foundation for Successful Leadership. Center Street, 2014.
17 Woo, Jenny. “Harvard-Trained Researcher: People with High Emotional Intelligence Always Do 3 Things When Talking to Others.” CNBC, 18 July 2024.
18 Murphy, Bill, Jr. “Emotionally Intelligent People Use a Single Brilliant Question to Find Gratitude and Live Happier Lives.” Inc., 23 November 2023.
19 Patrick, Wendy L. “What to Say to Make People Remember You — Fondly.” Psychology Today, 24 January 2021.
